A friend of mine recently sent me an email that said,
“Be a good-finder; not a fault-finder.”
Wow…GOOD advice! 🙂
It reminded me of something that Pindar, the main mentor in John David Mann’s and my book, The Go-Giver said to his protégé, Joe:
“Go looking for the best in people, and you’ll be amazed at how much talent, ingenuity, empathy and good you’ll find.”
Amazing how that works!
And, great news — there’s no reason to wait until January 1st. We can begin now!
As an exercise, find something good in everyone you see today. You might have to really search, or it might be readily apparent. Whichever, be sure and find it.
And, if the situation is appropriate, communicate to that person the “good thing” you see in them.
As always, feel free to share any comments here to let us know the results.
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People will jump over high hurdles, fight fires and break through walls for leaders that find them doing things right. Building that kind of chemistry is absolutely essential if a team is going to jell.
Jeff: Thank you for your kind feedback. And, as the leader of a large sales organization and former client from years ago, I know first-hand that those on your team would absolutely do that for you. Can’t wait until the release of your new book, “The Sales Tour Guide” is out!
We can always find fault… However choosing to find the positive is going to get you a lot further in business and in life and… give you a lot better outlook in life…
Carly: Thanks for your comment. Indeed, so true, and you’re a great example of one who does that on an ongoing basis!
Absolutely LOVE this Post…We can always find fault… However choosing to find the positive is going to get you a lot further in business and in life… What a great way to end the Holidays with this post. Thanks for writing it Bob…
It is a challenge when it comes to those who are.. challenging to you. However, you are completely right. It is always best to look at the positives about everyone, even those who you may not be all that crazy about 🙂 Sometimes the only positive thing you can say is that they did a great thing for you by no longer being in your life, and freeing your life up for those who are worthy of your time.. then that is the thing to focus on instead of why you do not like them. Good reminder.
Miriam: Indeed, often a challenge! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us!
Carly and Miriam are right on target. Let me add that I find by expecting the best out of people, and acting that way, I get a lot of great people experiences that might otherwise have gone the other way.
Bob: Thank you. Great point. As you alluded, looking for the best in others actually changes you first, and that’s what changes them. Way to go!!
Bob Pond makes a great point; when we begin to look for the best in others, it strengthens our relationships with those folks that we previously may have avoided. In the process, we become more gracious (and it then becomes easier to see the good in more people…). It’s a wonderful process that empowers everyone involved! Great post, Bob.
Pastor Greg: Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Indeed, I agree with you and Bob Pond completely. It makes for a terrific and benevolent “circle of success!” 🙂
OOHHHH LOVE this expression Bob – a Good-Finder and a Go-Giver – perfect DOWN TO EARTH expressions that bring value for everyone just by reading them!!!!!!!!!!!! I smiled when I saw it – You did it again – HUGE hugs and Love!
Lene: Thank you for your always-kind feedback, my friend. Huge hugs and love back at ya’! 🙂
This is wonderful, Bob. And when we find the good in others, it changes how we feel about the world. Our lives are happier and more fulfilling, because we realize that the world is filled with Good!
Anita: Thank you, my friend. I love the way you think! :-). And, congrats to you and Warren on the release of your new book, “Billions Rising.” May it sell…billions! 😉
Many Thanks to Carly Alyssa Thorne for sending me to this blog post. It becomes so easy to find fault and become sucked up in a negative vortex. Since I’ve started looking for the good life has become so much more fun.
Fred: Thank you. Great to hear about the change you’ve found in yourself since taking that new focus. Way to go! And, thank you, Carly! 🙂
Bob – wonderful reminder. I have to admit that the biggest challenge I have here is a self-critical spirit – over-much dwelling on the bad in my own soul. Those lenses of finding the wrong too regularly discolor (quite subconsciously but really) the way I view others. This old dog is slooowly learning the new trick of focusing on the good!
Steve: Thank you for sharing that. I can definitely relate. I think that for many of us it’s an ongoing process, both with finding the good in ourselves as well as in others!
Even when dealing with poor performance, start with the positive. “Pat, we’re very pleased with how well you’re doing with _______. Are there some ideas from that success which can help with improving ______?” I found this approach helped focus the person on problem solving vs. becoming defensive.
Dan: Thank you. Great advice. I appreciate you sharing with us!
Hi Bob, The media is fixated on reporting largely’bad news’ and ignoring positive and heroic things people do everyday. Why don’t you start a good finder news channel.
As for being a good finder in business look at the ‘Apprentice’ on how not to do it!
Stay Well Stay Happy
John
John: Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and feedback. Much appreciated!
Dear Bob,
I love your books and appreciate your blog. Thank you for sharing your wisdom. As a writer and speaker, I admire what a positive impact you are making in so many lives. Hope I get to meet you at NSA one day!
Susan: Thank you. What a kind and thoughtful comment. Please know how much I appreciate that. Hope to meet you, too!