A recent tweet said:
“An entire sea of water can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside. Similarly, the negativity of the world can’t put you down, unless you allow it inside your heart and mind.” ~ A. Nonymous
This makes a lot of sense. To believe we don’t live in a world filled with negativity would be to delude ourselves.
Of course, there’s also much positivity but there’s a difference:
When you drink a glass of clean, pure water it sustains you, but it doesn’t generally cause a feeling one way or the other. We simply accept it — often unconsciously — for what it is.
However, put just a little bit of poison in that water and the consequences are profound.
Fifteen nice, decent people might not have much of an effect on your day. After all, people are supposed to be nice and decent. We simply accept it.
However, what happens when one miserable, insulting creep crosses your path? One’s entire day can change for the (much) worse…
That is, IF we let that negativity get inside us.
Two ways to keep it from sinking our ship:
- Choose not to take it personally. This takes a lot of work on an ongoing, consistent basis. For an excellent guide in this regard, read Don Miguel Ruiz’, The Four Agreements.
- Surround yourself with positive. Read, watch, and listen to good, positive, uplifting materials on an ongoing, consistent basis. And, hang out with good, positive, uplifting people as much as you can.
A ship fortified to that degree simply cannot be sunk.
What are some of the ways you protect the ship that is your mind?
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Love what you say here Bob. Sometimes we can get the wrong end of the stick and hold onto negativity which is purely fictional! This can be for all sorts of reasons and for my clients it’s often about cultural misinterpretation. To continue with your boat metaphor Bob, we need to make sure our navigation instruments (self-awareness) on board are always fine-tuned so that we are aware of possible dangers (ice-bergs maybe?) and then are prepared to change course as appropriate!
Fantastic, Clare. I love your interpretation…and great suggestions. Thank you!
Excellent reminders in this post. Reminds me of the wisdom of obtaining your happiness and validation internally rather than externally.
Easier said than done though as we are also wired to fit in so feedback can be important to that.
Cherish fitting in with the good people.
Thank you, Doug. Appreciate your kind feedback and suggestions! Thank you!
“An entire sea of water can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside. Similarly, the negativity of the world can’t put you down, unless you allow it inside your heart and mind.” ~ A. Nonymous
Love this and it is sooo sooo true…
We are the captains of our Minds-Bodies-Spirits
What we let invade it sinks us… or we fight and find the help and the way to rise above the water or even learn the tools beforehand so that we don’t even let the water get in…
Alas though we are human and we are bound to get some water in occasionally then the key is
as Bob would say do we choose to respond or react… LOL…
And of course everything you said in the blog are true and exact tips as usual…
Carly, thank you for your always kind and encouraging feedback, and for your fantastic teaching! Thank you!
I love the metaphor Bob, as it clarifies and simplifies what is happening. I’ve come to know that recognizing my boat is leaky is vital. Water leaks in all the time, through various holes; and mistakenly, I might reach for a shot glass to flood it out, but really need a giant sump pump to make the water go outside my vessel. Best way for me to create vacant space is to start my day writing down what I’m grateful for. It is then that I notice I’ve been walking around in knee deep muck needlessly.
One way is to continually feed your mind the positive. In other words, get a dose of Burg every week to inoculate you against the negative.
Skip: Funny you say that — And I was going to suggest they get a dose of Skip Prichard, one of the most uplifting, positive, and encouraging leaders and friends I know! Thank you for your kind words!
Doug: Thank you for sharing that with us. And, the first step is recognizing the issue in the first place, so big congrats! It also sounds like you are following an excellent game plan. Gratitude is such a key to happiness and peace of mind in all regards! Again, thank you!
Good stuff, Bob. Thanks.
We often reenforce the negativity by viewing the world through TV News and reality shows. We need to remember that’s what “sells the soap” so to speak. It’s not representative of the way the world really is.
Keeping lists of things that go right or of things for which we are grateful can really help put life in perspective.
On any given day each of us can make a list of 20-30 things that went right before we even get in the car to go to work. That’s how I make my ship unsinkable (when I get the blues).
Thanks again for the reminder!
Dave, so glad you enjoyed the post. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us, as well as how YOU keep YOUR ship unsinkable. Great advice! Thanks again!
Bob, another great post here and what a great analogy to dropping a bit of poison in an otherwise clean glass of pure water to that of a difficult person. I had the honor of dining with Dr. Joey Faucette a few weeks back and discussing this very issue (I believe you endorsed him in his book, “Work Positive in a Negative World”). Negativity, left alone, can do visible damage to you personally and your workplace in a short period of time. Your advice is sound! Thanks!
Gary
Thank you, Gary. So glad you enjoyed the post and the analogy. Yes, Dr. Joey Faucette. Great guy. Hadn’t heard from him in a while. I’m so glad the two of you were able to meet up. I can only imagine what a terrific leadership conversation that was!
Having been a self employed entrepreneur for the last few years, this is my personal recipe for getting the water out of the ship once it gets in there 🙂
1. Touch base with my ‘Why’ – it helps to remember why I get out of bed.
2. Exercise, sleep, drink water & eat well. Sometimes I just need to get out of my head and spending time in nature helps to ground me.
3. Take my shoes off and sit on the floor with my boys. A great way to connect with what’s really important. I like to say “if it’s not important to my kids, then it’s not really important at all.”
4. Give. Making a positive difference to someone else’s life is a great antidote to a bad day.
Bob – thanks as always for being a great inspiration!
Best, Matthew
Thank you, Matthew, both for your kind words, AND your fantastic teaching and suggestions. I love all of them! 🙂
2 powerful steps Bob. I meditate for 1 hour daily to become more aware of when I am choosing to take on water. Doing so helps me to cease resisting the negative feelings, so I can release them and so I can release folks who caused me to bail out so much over the years. Thanks SO much for the tips and message Bob.
Ryan
Ryan, thank you for your kind words about the post. So glad you enjoyed it. And, thank you for sharing your wisdom with us. So glad you’ve found a way to cease resisting the negative feelings; such an important part of being able to release them. Thanks again!
Others will always have opinions. Some are not always good and congruent with what we are trying to achieve. You can accept it, or reject it. But don’t let it effect the relationship we have with the other person. You either do things in love or in fear. Chose love. I’ve also found that forgiveness is a very powerful, liberating thing. Set yourself free. Take full responsibility. To blame someone else, is handing over the power. You have no control over what others do! None! But what you can control is how you react to it.
Anna Lee, thank you for sharing your very-wise thoughts and advice!