In a recent post by Certified Go-Giver Coach, Linda Ryan, she suggested some great ideas for bringing yourself out of an emotional funk.
One of her readers wrote, “Why not just decide to be happy?”
It was an excellent question. And, knowing the reader personally, I know he is a successful business person with a great attitude and, I assume, happy, as well.
And, while there are those who really can simply make that decision and…be happy, that is not true for everyone; at least within their present life model.
For example, let’s take a person who has grown up in a family where they were taught life is miserable and all you can do is your best to survive. And, that happiness is not a natural state but simply something that only some lucky people have.
And, now, they are learning that is not necessarily the case. They are reading good books, listening to positive audios and ready to make a change based on this new information.
But, they’re still learning.
If that’s the case, he or she might need some “tools” that help them to apply that decision. Sometimes, just taking a personal accounting of all one is grateful for is enough to do it. And, sometimes, because life can really get us down, it’s important to — as Linda suggested — prepare in advance with that “bag of tricks.”
Of course, I totally agree with the reader that the first step is to simply make that decision! At the same time, don’t hesitate to use whatever “tools” you need to make it happen.
What do you think?
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You and Linda always write such great stuff! As I was reading I thought about the other day I was taking an eye test. You look at the board and wear a pair of glasses and the letters are suppose to pop out in 3D. As the clinician was asking me which ones looked 3D I realized that none were looking that way to me. She was asking me questions and looking funny at me because I was giving the incorrect answers. All of a sudden the letters just popped and I could CLEARLY see the 3D ones. The reason I tell this is because it is how I see the decision to just be happy and the bag of tricks. The decision is like a muscle that has to be used and practiced until one day it just pops and you can just be happy. Otherwise, you need the bag of tricks and to keep flexing that muscle until you can clearly focus.
Very wise, Christie. What a great way of looking at it – the muscle, the practice, and how it then becomes a natural part of our being. And, by the way, YOU write good stuff. Hmmm, maybe you have a post coming regarding the lesson you just taught of all us. I have no doubt you can tie that into your real estate niche. 🙂 By the way, looking forward to your new book coming out soon. Is there a release date on it yet?
Why thank you! I could write something about that couldn’t I?…(can you hear the wheels spinning? :))
Thank you so much. I am getting a few final pieces together and I am looking at a launch date of April 6th…so excited!!
Wow, once again (as often happens here) I’m learning as much from the comments as I am from your great post, Bob! Really great analogy, Christie. You strengthen the muscle through exercise and practice and then BAM! ~ the muscle is strong and serves you very well. Christie, I think you could be a professional commentor, as your ideas consistently add rich value to each post.
You bring up a great point, Bob in that making a decision to be happy is often much easier said than done. Having a few tricks up your sleeve makes it much easier. Big thanks for referencing my post, sir. Always honored and appreciative for your support 🙂
Christie: Great about the launch date. Please let us know when it’s out so we can promote it. I was honored to be able to read the manuscript; terrific book. Will save the careers of many in the Real Estate Sales Profession.
Linda: Christie WOULD be a great commentator, wouldn’t she. She definitely has the knack for it! 🙂
My pleasure to reference your post; it was a terrific one – very helpful!
Hi again! Thank you Linda!! I appreciate your super sweet words and both of you thinking I could be a commentator…I always saw myself as a talk show host 🙂 Maybe that’s a 5th business I could do!
Bob thank you so much for all you did for the me with the book. Your suggestions were instrumental in helping write more better 😉 Now I am really aware of how I write and I think it will make me a better blogger, and commentator as well!
I look forward to seeing you both in a few weeks!!!
You know what I think, Mr. Burg 🙂
Feel free to explain, Susan.
And the master does it again.. Another great question.
I was one of the ones who grew up in fear, anger, loneliness and unhappiness.
It wasn’t until I was in my 40’s and my mum came to visit … when she walked into
the room, she ooooozzed fear. It hit me… All of those years that I’d spent, on the
lookout for something to hurt me… all of the fear and unhappiness had NOTHING
to do with me… I’d simply absorbed my mum’s fears.
It’s not as if that was the end of it.. It was the beginning of my “recovery” though.
I spent the next bazillion years finding various tools to help remove a lifetime’s
worth of ingrained “unhappiness” habits.
I have found a whole lot of tools that really work well and am incredibly grateful
that fear is a distant memory and unhappiness is always my creation and is
very, very, very short lived.
It is not possible to get unhappy enough to make things change for the better.
I give myself a mental “whack upside the head”, let go of the point of view I’m
choosing to be unhappy about and get back to BEing happy. 🙂
Bob, you are a gift. Thank you
Karen, thank you greatly for sharing so much of yourself with us. Unfortunately, I’m sure that all-too-many people can relate. I’m so sorry for all the pain you had to endure, and very grateful that you have found a way to work at and break through! Lots of wisdom in your note!
Bob, thank you… and, I’m truly grateful for all of my life… I love and appreciate who I am today… I have more passion and compassion because of it.
I really believe that there is at least one gift in every challenge we face – if it’s only that we are finally (willing?) able to face the challenge.
More and more often, when something does NOT go the way I want it to, I get excited.. Experience has shown me that something even more wonderful is on its way 🙂
Thank you for being the space of allowing, accepting and appreciating.
Bob, when someone’s down, ill, or had a death in the family, I take them a brown paper bag full of tools. (the bag literally has a picture of a hammer and wrench on it.) If it’s a death in the family, I may fill the “tool bag” with a snuggie (as seen on TV LOL), a few movies, tea and candy. If they are ill, I fill it with Kleenex, soap, sprite, a small soft blankie, and socks.
I deliver it and say, “These comforting tools are gathered with love, it’s your choice whether you use them or not.”
Kind of like life… God gives us the tools and the choice, to be successful: all we have to do is pick them up and use them. Thanks to kind people like you, I’m gaining strength to pick mine up too.
Amy,what an incredibly AWESOME idea… Hope that you don’t mind if I borrow it… How incredibly thoughtful of you. thank you for sharing this wonderful idea 🙂
Amy,
BEAUTIFUL!!!
Amy I have heard you bring your beautiful package even for the death of a beloved pet.
Karen, all good things are for sharing, so share away my friend. Jean Thank you.
Christie, I’ve only done that one once, so I know where you heard it.:-) (that was the first time I did it. Their reaction was so precious that I’ve done it numerous times since then.)
WOW! WOW, WOW, and WOW. You are a blessing, Amy! (All of you are, of course. I’m just commenting on Amy’s idea.)
Amy, Love that! I think I will try that myself! Bob, great post! Christie, loved the analogy! I am thinking you have another Linda on your hands with Christie, Bob! This post really made me smile! We all have to break out our tool box every once in a while if for the only reason to see which ones we have and of course to learn how to use them! :O)
Michelle, great to see you here, my great friend. Thank you for popping by and joining the discussion, and for your very kind comments!