As discussed in a previous post, having to say no can be difficult and awkward. Whether due to a desire to please others or simply a difficulty with perceived conflict, the inability to turn down an offer or request you really don’t want to accept can result in both a loss of productivity and self-esteem.
As we ride along in the following video, let’s look at how we can do this in such a way that we can effectively say no while not only not offending the other person but causing them to respect you…and your boundaries a lot more.
{Note from Bob: Shame on me! Looking back at the video, I really set a horrible example by doing that post while driving. While it was actually a safe environment, it was still a really dumb thing to do. So, not only “please don’t try this at home” (you know what I mean) but I will never do that again.}
Hi Bob, thanks for sharing this. Last spring I committed to too many things…I was sure I could do it all but my husband had heart surgery and my mom became ill. I had no choice they were my first priorty and everything fell to the wayside. I had over promised everybody and the guilt I felt (and still do) was huge. I have taken pride in keeping my word and honoring my commitments to others.
So I have been trying to find a way to say no gracefully so I can honor them but more importantly honor myself!! Thanks for sharing how to do that!
OH by the way… You are right no driving and doing videos at same time!!
I love this and the “No thank you without a reason” is key. Last night I got a “Slick Willy sales call” and when I said, No Thank you, he asked, “Why not.” I answered, “No reason, just a decision I’ve made.” He said,”You have to give me the reason, otherwise you are trying to control me.” LOL Bob, Mr Willy is a good example of someone who would have twisted my arm with reason, so reasons are better left kept to oneself when saying No thank you.
Very important message. I don’t like to set limits on myself. But I definitely want to set boundaries. You need boundaries in order to live your life by the priorities that are important to you.
-RG
Bob, I love your emphasis on respectfully declining without giving an excuse. Of course, if we give an excuse the person making the request will try to help us remove that obstacle. I never thought about that part. THANKS!
Thank you for your comments, and for adding your wisdom to the video. Excellent points. Much appreciated!!
nice info 🙂