In a previous post we looked at the role our emotions play in making most decisions of significance. As human beings, we are a strange creature – making very important decisions based on what we want at the moment rather than what we know is really best for us.
Yes, before we rationalize (tell ourselves rational lies) with logic, we make decisions based on many types of emotions.
But here’s the key:
All emotions – perhaps all human action – can be boiled down into the following:
The desire for pleasure.
The avoidance of pain.
We decide what actions to take (buy or not buy a product, service, concept, idea, opinion, etc., and even like or not like a person) based on those two factors; pain and pleasure. They are what “make people tick.”
Let’s talk about those two major “emotions” because this subject has everything to do with the topic of positive persuasion or – as I often call it – “Winning Without Intimidation.”
What kind of pleasure do we as human beings pursue?
We know about physical pleasure, such as sexual pleasure or the pleasure of eating something mouth‑watering such as your favorite flavor of ice cream or – dare I say; a morsel of delight from one the many fine establishments known as, that’s right…Dunkin’ Donuts? 🙂
What about emotional pleasure – enjoying family and friends and the fun of doing fun stuff like vacationing, going to a ballgame, buying cool toys? The list is endless.
Then there is the emotional pleasure of power when dealing with people. Ahhh, now that is part of the ego. The ego THEY have. (Oh no, not us; Heaven-forbid.) 🙂
In fact, it’s at this point that the ego steps in as star of the show. And, we’ll discuss that in Part Two.
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Bob,
Great points! My favorite Zig Ziglar statement, “People listen to logic, but act on emotions!” However, not sure I need to see part 2, because I am the best I know at not having an ego – haha!
Hi Bob! I’m really looking forward to Part 2, because my experience is that the two Emotion Drivers you’ve noted are completely Ego-based: the desire for pleasure, the avoidance of pain.
I’m thinking that when the Ego’s not engaged, we’re more driven by a need to contribute, with meaning and significance. (Steve could perhaps speak to this as it seems he has found a way out of Ego!)
Integrating this with sales and marketing strategies is interesting. I’ll be reflecting on it today for sure. Thank you!!
Hi Steve, you’ve got me beat in that area then. 🙂 I still battle with the ol’ ego on a constant basis.
Hi Sally, great thoughts. I’m wondering, perhaps, if some of the pain/pleasure drives have to do with survival though (i.e. Maslow’s Hierarchy) and not ego. Your thoughts? Also, let’s see where the following articles take us as we continue to explore. I really enjoy your second paragraph, as well, and that would really seem to make a lot of sense.
Maybe Mr. Randy Gage will way in on this and give us his thoughts.
Thank you for the invite to continue the conversation Bob! I think it might come down to how we define Ego – because I agree with you … Maslow’s Hierarchy certainly supports the ‘pain/pleasure drive as motivation’ theory.
Maslow’s first four hierarchical levels are referred to as Deficiency Needs (D-Needs), with the final level, Self Actualization known as the Being-Need, or relating to Growth. Physiological, Security, Social, and Esteem needs arise due to deprivation. Satisfying these lower-level needs is important in order to avoid unpleasant feelings or consequences.
Ego, spiritually speaking, is also referred to as the False Self; the part of you that keeps you dwelling in thoughts of scarcity, deficiency, self-protection, etc. When you are ‘in Ego’ or driven by Ego — you are very Me Focussed. your attention and awareness tends to be rooted more in the past and the future than the present moment, and your thoughts, words and actions tend to be more self-serving than expansive.
When you get to a place where you truly understand that we’re all in this together – that what we desire most comes to us faster when we first gift it to another, when we’re rooted in the present moment instead of what is already gone (the past) or what does not yet exist (the future) ~ and when we embody and practice all that Go-Giving stands for … the desire for pleasure and the avoidance of pain are not factors you spend time thinking about ~ because right now, in this moment, all that truly exists – you’re thinking thoughts, speaking words and taking action that aligns with your desire to ensure support, love and happiness for all in your realm of influence: rendering pleasure without pain a working reality.
Does that make sense?
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