Met some new friends last Sunday at Dunkin’ Donuts. Both are in sales and met each other through their local BNI (Business Network International) organization. Both are obviously true Go-Givers and have built their businesses through a focus on providing value without concern for, or attachment to, reciprocity.
Margie does her best to help her prospects own what she sells but, when the fit is just not there, she refers them to a competitor who has what they need. One of her supervisors nearly goes out of his mind with disbelief when she does that. He can’t understand it. And he can’t believe she’s so successful. 🙂
Kevin received a referral from Margie to talk with the salespeople where Margie works about how they might be able to use his services. He didn’t receive immediate business. Meanwhile, all he did was provide value to them, continually and unceasingly. People called him naïve. Why would he do that? However, when he finally got their buy-in…
Does being a Go-Giver have positive results in the real world? Does taking the focus off of yourself and placing it on others really work? Only according to very successful people. To everyone else, it’s simply naïve.
Do you think it’s just a matter of Karma or are there practical reasons why those who focus on serving others seems to consistently outperform those who only think of themselves?
Let us know your thoughts.
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I think that “go-givers” have more of an abundance mentality. They are not fearful of their competition and therefore get more in the process through their being open to positive relationships and the energy that they project because of their mental state.
Julie Bartkus
Absolutely! No, wait…. ABSOLUTELY!
I call this “Sharing the love”.
People remember kind deeds, referrals, gestures, etc and will always think of you as the person who helped them get what they wanted. Being a reliable resource is ALWAYS the best policy.
Remember the saying “Never talk about religion or politics in mixed company?” Well, I’m going to touch on the Bible. (Not sure why this popped into my head, as I usually don’t talk about religion online – Someone out there must need to hear it!)
The Bible has many great marketing lessons to be learned…
“The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:19-23)”
If you applied this verse to your business and your life (Christian or not) you are sure to wreap the “fruit” of your efforts.
My Atheist husband would say this is just “common sense”, but I disagree. It’s easy to lose your way and act/react with prejudice, selfishness, and greed. The Bible can help center us again. In more ways than one.
Donna Payne, The Web Coach
@thewebcoach
Awesome. Thank you, Julie. That is certainly one reason why Go-Givers sell more!
{Note from Bob: Check out Julie’s really cool website for childcare professionals at http://www.lcforcc.com/}
Thank you, Donna. Some more excellent points. As you put yourself out there for others and focus on adding value to their lives, they have a desire to add value to yours. And, while you don’t necessarily do it *for* that reason, it is a natural result. Great thoughts, my friend. Thank you! I also enjoyed your last blog post at http://www.DonnaPayne.com.
Hi Bob!
Here’s a story about one of my favorite people on the planet, my mom! I think it’s great example of why being a Go-Giver, is the way to be…..:-)
My mother owns a thriving national recruiting/ placement agency that places high-level management personnel in the construction industry. She is one of the few women, as you might imagine, that work in this field. Her secret to success; she works from the heart, she’s a go-giver. She gives because it feels good and it’s a big part of who she is as a person. It brings her tremendous personal satisfaction to help folks find a job that is a great match and will provide them with stability, challenge and opportunity for growth. Rather than merely focusing on the bottom line and just making a match, she spends a good deal of time getting to know her clients and candidates both professionally and personally. This is time most recruiters would find unproductive but my mother knows this is the key to an effective, productive and long lasting match. She also knows that when her clients are happy they are more likely to call her again. This has proven to be the case over the last 18 years. Another tack, that my mother takes, (and I think might be her favorite part of the work,) is when she comes upon a candidate that a client will not pay for, but whom she knows will be a great employee. She will give them leads and referrals for an open position that her clients will not usually pay a recruiting/placement fee, (usually the case with a candidate that has not yet made the level of management that a company considers reasonable to pay a fee,) but that she knows, due to her relationship with her companies, are open. Rather than try to place an unqualified candidate or force a square peg in a round hole, just to make a quick buck, she will freely pass these leads to the candidate.
As I mentioned earlier, she does enjoy helping and watching a father, find work after being laid off for 3 months, but what else happens, when she gives in this fashion, is that this father eventually works his way up in the company and is in the position of recommending a recruiting/placement agency and you guessed it, he calls my mother! Chances are this same father/manager also has friends who either are in the position of hiring for their companies or who are looking to make a job change. Again, whom does he remember? My mother. And this has proven to be the case over and over again over the last 15 years or so.
Hope you’re having a great day!
~ Lauren
I believe to be really successful in life and in business I need to see the world through the eyes of others. I don’t know a person (or their needs) until I walk in their shoes. When I deal with people personally or professionally, I am doing it from THEIR perspective…not mine. With a purpose of serving others, my needs are taken care of automatically! As Zig Ziglar says, “You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help other people get what they want.”
If I deal with someone from my the perspective of my world, i.e. “What’s in it for me?” I am going to have a much harder time making friends, making sales and being truly happy as a fulfilled person.
This is something I struggle with at times because my basic nature is to think of me first. The good news is changing my perspective is getting easier every day!
Rick White
Yes, Julie – BINGO!
To me, no one is a competitor. But, rather, we can learn from each other.
I wonder… is “being open to positive relationships and the energy that they project because of their mental state” a learned disposition or a personality trait? Can anyone be trained or conditioned to be more open and giving? Just a thought.
Lauren,
Smooches, and love to your Mom – what a great role model. And look at all you’ve learned from her 🙂
Rick,
I love your perspective. You’ve answered my thought earlier… positive perspectives, being open and more giving CAN be learned. I think the hardest transition must be understanding “It’s not about YOU, it’s about THEM.” (I don’t remember who coined that? Must have been Zig?)
Much love to you both! dp @thewebcoach
ps. I suggest often that folks should inspire, lift-up, compliment or encourage 10 people every day. Without exception. It’s so easy to do – and some days, I don’t even leave my home! 🙂
Hi All – I’m enjoying your thoughs, commentary and suggestions very much!
Laura, your Mom is one of my new heroes!!
Bob
Being a “Go-Giver” has ALWAYS produced great results for my wife and I in both our business and personal lives!
I just have to share a story:
We recently received a call from one of our clients to perform some work which we were not equipped nor trained (we are now) to do. I referred the client to my direct competition (and our town is really small). A few weeks went by and we again ran into a similar situation while on a job, this time I called my competitor and asked him to come to the clients house (where we were working). When he arrived he shook my hand thanked me for the referral then we got to sharing some tips with each other! Now my wife and I have been in business in this industry for almost 2 whole years…my competitor for 15 years! Take a guess who learned a lot 🙂 And he asked us to cover his emergency calls while he is on vacation in a couple of weeks!
Live to Give!
Joe
Thanks for the wonderful blog and discussion. From my personal experience, Go-Giving works wonders in real life! Not only in sales, but across the board….with children, with parents, friends and relatives, and even in a regular 9-5 job. Whenever you give of yourself without thinking about yourself, you earn trust and friendship, and people will always come back to you. It works like a mathematical equation and never fails.
People have told me that it`s naive and that their generosity has been taken advantage of…but I don`t see it that way. If you`re “go-giving” with a stopper, counting the minutes for results to happen, you will probably be disappointed, and feel abused – but you were NOT “go-giving” with real intent in the first place. You were just testing the “trick” to see whether it works or not.
It sometimes takes time to show people that this really works. The concept does not always coincide with the “street smart” education people adopt. That`s why it`s so important to emphasize and discuss it repeatedly.
Thanks for the wonderful stories you all shared!
When I get a new idea or learn something new, I immediately want to teach it. When I meet someone new and learn about what they do … and if I like them, they leave an impression upon me that is favorably memorable, I immediately am thinking of who may be a candidate for what they are about.
In general, I think Go-Giver’s provoke others to help them out (thus the point). It’s about as natural as remembering a favorite place or event you’ve been to. You remember the important details because of the impression it left upon you. We automatically remember pleasurable experiences and share them with others without thought of “gain” in return, don’t we? If someone has a memorable experience with you, did not feel sold or manipulated, it’s just natural to tell others about it.
Then the fun part starts because it’s hard to keep up with the receiving some days …
A believer in giving first,
Jennifer Wideman
I’d like to offer an idea as to why Go-Givers ALWAYS sell more.
EVERYTHING is emotion. All of it.
Success in selling, or anything else for that matter, is only a matter of what degree of emotion you are willing to elicit and feel in the connection with another person.
GIVING results in touching a deeper emotion than most people experience on a daily basis. We all emotionally wander through our days with only brief and fleeting sparks of real emotional connections with anyone. Brief “conversations” about business, or the weather, or any number of mundane topics never really touch at the level that true giving touches. While we are all wandering, we are all also longing.
Now, along comes a Go-Giver. A Go-Giver offers an emotional connection that is different from the typical day-to-day, emotionally deficient wandering. This Go-Giver takes us to a place, whether we consciously realize it or not, that we all want to live. A place much more fulfilling than a transactional connection can ever be. Going to that place will always result in “selling” more of anything whether that be an idea, a product, a service or ourselves.
In short, giving touches deep inside all of us and everything great flows from that deep place.
I am flat out blown away by these amazing stories and teachings y’all are sharing. Thank you so much!!!!! – Bob
Was taken directly here from your tweet, so, I can’t wait to read the article…. 🙂 Well, comments on it 🙂
We started a Go Givers Group in Calgary, AB. It is by invite only to those who qualify as ‘givers’. We are servants who tend to the needs of others, naturally and without expectations. We are resources in the community, volunteers, mentors, and coaches. We gain wisdom every day, developing our understanding of how to meet the needs of others. This behaviour brings us success and a reputation that clients and employers love…
A U.S. News & World Report recently covered a story exploring the subject of ‘happiness’. According to the article, scientists have found that “strong marriages, family ties, and friendships predict happiness, as do spirituality and self-esteem. Hope is crucial, as is the feeling that life has meaning.” But what if some of these elements are missing in our lives? Researchers say that “HELPING people be a little happier can jump-start a process that will lead to stronger relationships, renewed hope, and general upward spiraling of happiness.”
What we GIVE, more than what we get, produces joy in our lives. The Bible says, “The generous soul will be made rich, and he who waters will also be watered himself” (Proverbs 11:24-25). I also believe in divine destiny… We are all touched by Grace if we look and listen for the signs to act.
Hey folks! FYI
Maybe y’all already know about the future of The Go-Giver enterprise, but I just found a real gem and cannot wait to share it with the world – the Facebook Fan page for the Go-Giver MOVIE! OMG! http://www.facebook.com/GoGiverMovie#/GoGiverMovie
Hi Everyone! I am from Antigua and Barbuda. I have never heard of the expression ‘Go Giver’ before. I like it. I have heard and understand – spread the love. I am trying to be more giving- it does take work. My answer is to give away free property listing ads on my new website wizard4property.com. I don’t know if this qualifies me as a Go Giver, but I think it’s a step in the right direction. Thanks to all for an illuminating discussion.
I’m a proponent of giving, but one must “have” in order to “give”. This economy has effectively taken from those who have, and thus they are in a position of need. People who need must endeavor to take before they can give. So in reality, or in terms of this current reality, all of the Sunday-Sermon, feel good, Tony Robbins fist pumping, Ziglerisms, are just so many platitudes, wasted on those in transition, as it’s now called. Remember, there is not 10% unemployment. When you’re out of work, it’s 100%.
Hi Bob, while I appreciate your concern and feel great sympathy and empathy for those who are in a position of need, I think you may have taken the idea of the article out of context and, based on what you wrote in the last half our your comments, are perhaps using it as way to express some anger rather than being constructive.
While the following that I’m about to say is also out of the context of this article, which focuses on the sales aspect of being a Go-Giver, I believe it is of enough importance to comment: People who are in need can also give. Everyone can give; everyone can find a way to provide value to others. It might be through a kind word or a listening ear. It might be by holding a door open for someone or by giving their seat to someone who appears to need that seat more than they do. And, it’s often by focusing on the value you can add to others that good things make their way back.
Indeed, things are very difficult for a lot of people right now. I don’t believe the answer is to ignore the wisdom that the Robbins, the Ziglars, The Rohns and others out there are providing. Instead, it’s to learn from them (and from others) what will best put you in a position to be able to prosper while adding value the world.
Keep in mind something that Zig Ziglar says that, in my opinion, is very true (paraphrased): A positive attitude will not allow you do do just anything, but it will allow you to do everything better than will a negative attitude.” I wouldn’t call that a “platitude”…I’d call it some really good advice. And it’s only wasted when we give up and stop trying.
I wish for you the very best.
Bob
I must say I’ve been trying to find some quality blog writing covering this Google isn’t showing as many hits as you might think. Perhaps I shouldn’t be surprised :). Anyway, happy to come across your article. Perfect – bookmarked. Just wanted to say thanks !!