Summing up Part One, we could say that Happiness is both a decision and a skill-set. And, we can actually develop the Habit of Happiness.
In this article, I’d like to quote several passages from one of my favorite books on this topic. Appropriately enough, it’s entitled Happiness. The author is my dear friend, Rabbi Zelig Pliskin. He writes:
“We each have much to appreciate and enjoy every day of our lives. What stops us? It’s easy to take for granted that which we already have. We are excited with new things. We focus on the pleasure and feel good. After we get used to what we have, we tend not to focus on it any longer. We tend to focus instead on what we don’t have. The Sages taught, ‘He who has one hundred wants two hundred.’ Focusing on what you are missing makes you overlook what you have.”
He suggested the following exercise, which helped me a great deal in the days when I was not as appreciative of all my blessing as I should have been:
“Train your brain to become more mindfully aware of all that you can appreciate and enjoy. Be mindful of your ability to see. Be mindful of your ability to hear. Be mindful of your ability to talk. Be mindful of your ability to walk. Be mindful about your ability to move your hands, and to lift, pull, turn, press, and hold things with them. This alone will transform your life. The person who is mindful about these things will have a brain that is so full of appreciation and enjoyment that it will be free from many of the thoughts and pictures that create bad feelings.”
He then went on to list a large amount of other things, gifts and possessions that one might take for granted and suggesting:
“Imagine how appreciative you would feel if you were missing all that you have and then you obtained them one by one. This is a great exercise to practice when your mind is free and otherwise would focus on worries or on unhappiness-producing thoughts.”
It certainly helped me. Now, I was thinking this was going to be a two-part series but, would it be okay with you if we took it one step further?
Until next time, Be Happy (I know, I could have said “Don’t Worry Be Happy” but the younger readers probably don’t remember that hit song by Bobby McFerrin). 🙂
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Hi Bob, Loved both Part 1 & Part 2. Thank you. That exercise puts you in a state of Gratitude and that’s a good place to be for so many reasons. 🙂
Thank you, Kirsty. Yes, I’m not sure how anyone could actually go through that exercise – with feeling – and not find themselves in a state of extreme gratitude. Such as how I’m very grateful for your friendship! 🙂
Bob
Love your blog. Positive & Informative. Thanks Bob!
Thank you, Cheryl…much gratitude to/for you!
Bob
Great, practical post on how to cultivate [I just noticed that “cultivate” is an active verb, meaning taking action on our part] the art of happiness.
The examples cited from Rabbi Pilskin are so sublime, Bob. As I read and re-read them, I found a deep appreciation and awe for those abilities anew.
Perhaps many of us were not taught some practical ways to be grateful for the things we do have, and take for granted. Perhaps some of us learned some of these skills later in life, and are grateful to have a reminder 😉
If I may share something that has helped me when I’m “on the ball” and actively cultivating a gratitude mindset, or if I find myself feeling less-than-enthusiastic about life? It’s is a quick exercise which doesn’t take much time [maybe 2 mins. a day], a pen and paper [if handy, I use a pocket daily planner with one of those thin pens attached which some companies give out as marketing gifts near Jan. 1st]. In that small section of planner, I start writing the things I’m grateful for in my life such as my family, my cats at home, my home, my profession, the gifts of my education, etc. If I’m in a particularly funky mood that day, I might start out with more mundane but essential gratitude items, like breathing, seeing, walking, hearing and the likes to get my brain thinking in that vein.
There are days when I feel gratitude-challenged and this exercise creates a different reality in my brain and brain-chemistry which replaces the not-so-grateful thoughts with grateful ones.
Happiness and gratitude are states I much prefer to dwell in and share with others these days.
Thank you, Heather. Excellent insights and great exercise suggestion. Terrific idea! And I like your term, “gratitude challenged.” I think we all (when I say “all”, I mean at least I) 🙂 get like that from time to time. Especially in North America where we have so much that it’s easy to forget that everything, including the barest essentials such as sight, hearing, etc. (okay, and even a really good cuf of Dunkin’ Donuts coffee) 🙂 is all a blessing. Thank you for sharing.
Hi Bob,
Great advice, thank you for this. The part about focusing on what you’ve got rather than what you’re missing reminded me of:
“As you walk and eat and travel, be where you are. Otherwise you will miss most of your life.” — Buddha
In grateful appreciation,
Fiona.
I love the idea’s and insight’s that everyone has shared in this post. I may have to “borrow” a few 🙂 Appreciation is such a simple key to happiness, no wonder it often gets overlooked. How many time are we reminded to “stop & smell the roses”? I always understood that reminder as a suggestion to enjoy myself along the way. It never dawned on me to stop and be thankful! Maybe its just me, maybe I’m a little slow, maybe smelling the roses was never intended to be a reminder for being appreciative for the many gifts that we have. But for me, smelling the roses now has a deeper meaning. Thank you everyone for helping to shape my life! Have a fun 4th!
Joe
Thank you, Fiona. Yes, the advice of the Buddha is very helpful and can keep us focused on the joy and blessings we already have. Thank you, my great new friend and favorite director. 🙂
Bob
Borrow away, Joe. I know I am. I’v also enjoyed the insights that everyone has shared, including yours. That’s a great thought regarding the saying you mentioned. Makes sense; it’s not just a matter of enjoying yourself, but “appreciating” the fact that you’re enjoying yourself. Goes right back to the importance of consciousness. Thanks again, my friend!
Bob