We’ve all heard the expression, “The more things change the more they stay the same.” How true this is, especially in terms of cultivating new business.
As “Social Media” (Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, etc.) becomes utilized by more and more people, the potential for its mis-use in terms of productive business-building becomes greater and greater.
The first thing I note (and most of my online social/businss networking is done on Facebook and Twitter) is the number of – ugg, I hate this word – pitches from people for their product or service…when first connecting!! No relationship-building; no focusing on the other (and, no, thinking you’re going to help them by their buying from you is not focusing on them) :-), no taking time to identify want, need or desire; no respecting the process, just pitching. {Side note: on Twitter this is often done via auto-responder which I believe, as the saying goes, “adds insult to injury”)
This is the online equivalent to introducing yourself to someone at a Chamber of Commerce or other business mixer and immediately shoving your business card at them and telling them all about what you do. Does that really achieve the desired result? While we can “never say never” we can definitely say the odds are well against it, both for short and long-term success.
Remember, “All things being equal, people will do business with, and refer business to, those people they know, like and trust.” This doesn’t happen as a result of being pitched but as a result of knowing the other person has their best interests in mind.
So, when connecting with someone online, instead of pitching your product or service or asking yourself how they can help you, ask yourself, “how can I somehow provide value – real value – to the relationship, and effectively communicate my desire to do so?”
If sales and referrals are going to happen, they will…after you’ve proved yourself to be an asset of value; not a taker of energy.
Enjoy this post? Receive an update when our next post is published by entering your best email address below and clicking Get Updates.
Oh so right on! Drive-by postings and trying to get someone into the back seat on the first date… “Stupid” is the word that comes to mind.
Relationshipping > Friendshipping > Partnershipping > Leadershipping. NO shortcuts. THEN, you’ve earned the right to receive. (Sounds kinda’ Go Giver to me 8^)
Guy named Burg once taught me the best early Relationshipping line I’ve ever heard (and since used). “So Bob, tell me how I’d know when I’m speaking to someone who’d be a perfect customer (prospect, partner…) for you and your business?”
Thanks for being an island of productive sanity in the mad mad world of social media Bob.
I appreciate you.
The tools remain the tools, no matter how much they act like 2nd nature to some of us. How we show up online is nearly no different to the Chamber of Commerce or any other networking event. These days, I like to find people to network with at an event BEFORE the event happens on Twitter. If that isn’t possible, quickly messaging each other in person helps us find each other for future reference too. And, practicing Endless Referrals by introducing people to each other online is fantastic. The principles don’t change, but the tools help us connect further and faster.
Thanks again Bob!
Bob,
You hit the nail on the head here my friend. Social media communities have given people one more place to put their bad marketing habits on display. It’s too bad every Twitter profile doesn’t come with a copy of the Go-Giver. That would fix it!
Glenn
Hi Bob,
I only can agree with you !
New media give a false image of shortcuts to many people.
This was the case for email when people started using it, now it so for online networking websites like Facebook and LinkedIn and other tools like Twitter.
Like you said it still is about building relationships whatever medium you use.
Thanks for sharing your insights !
Jan
Jan Vermeiren, founder of Networking Coach and author of How to REALLY use LinkedIn
Bob,
Great word!!! Your post says it all. Stick to the basics, get to know people, find out how you can bring value to them and you’ll always have a win-win. If there ends up being a need that you can fill with your product or service it’s icing on the cake.
Thanks again for keeping the message clear and simple!!
Dear Bob; YES! YES! and Another YES! Great article of what life and business (should) is really all about! It is a privilege to know you.
Thanks.
Brenda Lea
You hit it on the head! People are pitching before they even meet you with auto DM’s in Twitter and many times their custom message in Facebook as well. For any networking to be mutually beneficial there has to be the communicative exchange streaming both ways. You can never build a relationship without mutual communication.
That is the magical thing about combining your beautiful “know, like and trust” mindset with social networking tools; IF you distill what people know, like and trust you for (and you should do that before embarking on ANY networking activity because it is a good way to understand your inherent VALUE) then sites like Facebook and twitter offer the perfect showcase (or distribution channel) for that value. But if you believe that people do business with you based on your OFFER you will be one of those people who say “social networking doesn’t work.” Because it doesn’t work THAT WAY.
You are so right, Bob. Luckily, it is easy to unfollow when people are just “pitching.” Thanks for sharing as always.
Bob, you are writing about the fundamentals. It always seems to come back to that, doesn’t it?
Champions practice the fundamentals of their trade even after they get to the top. I’m always encouraging my clients who want to create a Champion Organziation to focus on the basic fundamental of business first. If you don’t get them right, you can forget about getting anything else right.
I agree Bob. I imagine people just do not know any better. They likely would not do such in a face-to-face setting due to the reaction they would get. However, they do not have to see the response of the person to whom they spam, so it makes it easier. I suppose they just “hope” it will work out. The more I listen to your trainings and read your books, the more I know how I absolutely will do business at all times.
Thanks for your great wisdom as always,
Jennifer
Thank you, everyone, for your very kind comments and feedback. By the way, several of the authors of these comments have terrific resources you might want to check out; Jan Vermeiren’s latest work is “How to REALLY Use LinkedIn. I’m partway through it and enjoying it very much. http://www.how-to-really-use-linkedin.com/
Glenn Garnes is co-founder of The Perfect Networker http://www.ThePerfectNetworker.com.
John Milton Fogg is author of the classic (and multi-million bestseller), “The Greatest Networker in the World.” http://johnmiltonfogg.com/
Dixie Gillaspie is not only a coach but really our go-to person regarding The Go-Giver program. {Click on her link on the “blogroll” above and on rightside of this page}
I don’t want to leave anyone out so speak up if I should have highlighted something about your work as it pertains to this topic. And no, you’re not “pitching.” I asked. 🙂
Dear Bob,
As always, thank you for sharing your insight. I couldn’t agree with you more, sadly enough there are many individuals on these social networking sites that lack that special touch and are unaware of the basic principles of building relationships online and even offline. It’s all about them and there is no real value proposition when these “pitches” are being made. In order to truly appreciate, understand and enrich your relationships, whether business, personal, or platonic you must commit yourself to being a person who is passionate about giving value first and building trust. Thank you, again for this wonderful post. The next time, that someone gives me one of their “pitches” I just might send them this blog posting. 🙂
With greatest regards,
Vanessa
Thanks, Bob!!
YES!! Social Media are to Sales Pitchers what winning the Lottery is to a Crack Addict – it’s just gonna magnify the problems that are already there.
-D